Home

Oh how much more you appreciate home when you are forced to live so far away.
I didn't realize how much I really missed home till I find myself here right now, surronded my amazing family.
I look around the room and see the love and smiles and realize how much I miss at school.
I miss sitting down with my uncle and watching a hockey game, that the leaf are most likely going to loose,
or sitting on my grandmas lap pretending to be two again and literally squishing the air right out of her,
or playing games with the family and laughing so hard we're rolling on the floor in pain,
or driving to an old classmates house to catch up and see some long lost friends,
or seeing my baby cousin for the first time,
or laying in my old bed looking at the AWESOME yellow walls,
or hearing my parents talk in the other room while I fall asleep,
or sleeping in till 10 and going upstairs to an amazing breakfast prepared with love just for me,
or just watching my family as they talk, laugh and joke with one another over tea and cheese lol.

Yes, it's good to be home. Why do we always have to say goodbye, It's like we're always getting together just to leave again. Oh what a day that will be, when my Jesus I shall see. When every tear shall be wiped away. No more goodbyes. Did I mention I hate goodbyes......well I do. But for now on this cruel, sin-filled earth we shall just part again.
For now I'll enjoy it. While it lasts and hang on till the next time I get to come home to this heaven on earth again, the place I call HOME. (temporary home:)

Th Sickness of Sin

Being sick is never fun.

It started with a head cold. Moving to my lungs it started to creep into my body. Waking up Wednesday morning it had hit my entire being like a freight train. I could barely move, for the fact that I didn't even want to move. It hurt to breathe. But school is not an option in college. No matter how you feel you must continue to go, go, go. I tried to fight it but the flu is not something that leaves ones body quickly. It is in no rush to evacuate the premise and in my case it was no different. Heading to the gymnastics gym Tues. night with my hood over my head, shoulder slumped in exhaustion from the constant battle inside me and a big pair of sweat pants i was not in the mood to hold others up or do any time or form of physical movement. My head was hot and my joints felt as if they had sand paper in them, leaving me with no energy to do anything but survive. I had not been sick like this in a very, very long time. Walking back to my dorm room, slowly and painfully I began to think, as I often do when I have alone time. This sickness had absolutely taken over my entire being. It changed my personality. I was tired and not as optimistic about life and my friends could tell. Something was wrong. Made me think of what sin does to us. Not only our physical bodies but definitely our spiritual well being. It takes us over completely causing us "aches and pains" of a spiritual battle inside of us. It changes us and people can tell. Changes us for the worst. But this too does pass. I tried to let my body fight the sickness, but was forced to give in, give in to the medication. There is no relief like that of a cough drop when your throat is on fire or your lungs are dry heaving in pain. That medicine for our spiritual is the one and only life giver, Jesus Christ. Only He can cleanse us from the inside out and relieve that sinful pain.

When you're sick you avoid certain things too. Sounds familiar to avoiding temptation of sin. I couldn't eat sugar. In fact for once in my life I revolted sugar thinking of the damage it would do to my immune system causing this awful sickness to drag on even longer. I didn't down a nutty bar even though it tasted good cause I knew the consequences would be more sickness. So why put yourself in a situation where you are forced to be tempted with sins sickness. Christ is our only hope. He is the physician, the great healer, our medicine. Good news this medicine doesn't taste horrible either like buckleys or halls, all it takes is one question. one question to have God take complete control of your life. Complete control of your defense system against the sickness of sin.

In His hands

We've all seen this picture so many times...













Hands cradling the world
Very strong, scarred and capable hands

I'm watching a youtube video and that image flashed across my screen. But this time it was different. I really took in that picture. How amazing it is that God has this world in HIS hands!?! He holds us, so what do we have to fear. As a little kid I use to sing (and maybe still sing it to myself:) the song "He's got the whole world in His hands." So incredible! AND not only is the world in His hands but look how small it seems in His mighty hands. This one picture in particular didn't show the world as being larger than God's hands but the world is small and completely encircled in his big hands. No need to fear cause these worldly problems and disasters are tiny when placed in God's hands and so are you're problems and concerns. To us they seem gigantic and too big for us to hold but for God, there is not argument that he can easily handle them and take care of us!

Not only does He hold this entire world and universe but He holds me, and YOU!
Whatever your worries and cares for today, put them into His VERY capable hands. After all He's got you and me sister in His hands! He's got you and me brother in His hands. He's got the WHOLE WORLD in His hands.

Isaiah 40:12 says Who has measured the waters in the hollow of his hand, or with the breadth of his hand marked off the heavens? Who has held the dust of the earth in a basket, or weighed the mountains on the scales and the hills in a balance?

A look at the scale

Had a good laugh with the gals today after abs class:

we disscussed best criteria to follow before weighing yourself for optimal result.
oh we laughed so hard:)!

-shower
-wash your face...don't want the makeup weighing you down
-brush your teeth
-take of any possible extra weight (clothes, hair pins, elastics)
-clip your toe nails
-go to the bathroom:)
-wash your hands

It was all laughs and fun but it made me realize how superficial us girls can be sometimes.
some picture of being thin is beautiful. somehow there's a cookie cutter shape we all have to fit into to make us beautiful. I have fallen into this lie too. the Lie satan shoves in our faces everyday that our personalities don't matter, WHO we are on the inside doesn't matter but rather what we look like. step out girls. stand strong. The Lord created you to be you. Let's all see the heart like Christ. Heard a song on the radio about a young womans' heart of gold. So why not look for those....those hearts of gold. They are the real beautiful things. The real beauty within:)

Rubbing off

Do you ever find yourself taking on someone else's habits/mannerisms after you've hung out with them for a while?
Whether it be a friend or aquantence, you seem to take on their attitude, or sayings.

I know that sometimes how I talk/react to a person depends first on how they interact with me. If a person is warm and welcoming I find myself opening up and being friendly back. I would hope that that is not true if a person is cold to me and that I would in turn be cold back but they can just take more effort on my part and be harder to hang out with comfortably. I wouldn't be myself around them as with those I feel comfortable with.

For example I will act a certain way with certain people, NOT saying that I change who I AM but rather what I do/act based on what I know about that person. Two of my roommates over the years have been those specific people. At summer camp this year I "roomed" with the girls director, Chiara Stellacci for a while and I found myself talking like her sometimes or acting like her after hanging out for a while. Her caring and charismatic personality was "wearing off" on me in a positive way. I found myself trying to be more caring and accepting of others because that is the way SHE is. And the occassional expressions she would use would often escape my own mouth without me even realizing it sometimes.

Another such person is my current roommate here at Southern, Nicole Ley. She's a person whose positive influence is "rubbing off" on me. If you don't know her, I HIGHLY recommend that you get to know her! She has a huge heart and a high-energy spirit!! She is so much fun and I find myself wanting to be a happier person when I'm around her. When she talks there is a sparkle in her eyes like a joy for life, and she listens when you talk to her with all her attention. I strive to be like these two amazing women of God and I feel like I'm a better person for knowing them and having them in my life. I hope that never changes and our friendships don't die. My mannerisms are still my own personality they are just made better around these people.

Speaking of mannerisms, makes me think of families. Don't you find yourself in a situation and someone notices how much you sound like your mother or father or you act like your brother or sister?. Growing up in my home, many positive solid foundations were laid for my life. I would watch my parents and learn from what they did. I began to act like them and speak like them (and I still do:). So in a sense they've worn off on me:)! I often get the remark that I laugh JUST LIKE my mom and smile like my dad. When I'm being silly or playing around I sometimes act like my brother. I've taken their positive examples and strive to always work harder and do better because of their influence on me.

So the argument definetly does stand that whoever you choose to hang around with, will affect who you are. They will "rub off" on you whether you see it happening or not. Are you hanging around with friends who will make you want to strive to be a better, happier, more christ-like, loving, accepting, and joyful person? Or are you taking on their negative traits? Who we spend time with affects the people we become. SO spending time with Christ can only mean ONE thing. We become more like Him. That's definetly a positive relationship! the more time you spend with HIM the more his character will "rubb off" onto you!! That's awesome. Want to become a more Christ-like person? Hang out with Chirst. you can't go wrong there!

Mountains & Goodness

God is Good, All the Time
All the Time, God is Good

This seems to be one of my maman's favorite sayings. I love it!
It's so true!
This past week I had many struggles, breakdowns, desperate prayers, alone time and tears. I thought I God had forgotten me. But this weekend reminded me of the fact HE will never forget His children. Even in the darkest times when I couldn't hear anything but my fearful thoughts He was right there with me. And he reminded me of that by surrounding me with AMAZING friends. I don't know what I would do without them. And even above that, my parents. They are so supportive and just talking to them makes my crazy world all make sense. I can't thank God enough for my family and Friends. Here at school they take time to pick me up off my butt, talk to me, and just sit with me while I cry it all out. My roommate (Nicole Ley) has been with me every step of this terrible week. She has put up with my ranting and raving, my indecision, my tears, my anger, my absolute immaturity. And then those who take time to throw chocolate at me when I'm just face down on the floor completely overwhelmed:) (Julie Landess and Beth Corn)
God gave me signs of throughout this entire weekend. An amazing text of encouragement from my brother, a skype time to talk with my maman cause she knows exactly what to say to help me through what I'm going through, and a relaxing time with friends sabbath afternoon. oh yes and then a breakfast date with my roomie this morning.
So now I'm off to the library to DO MY MOUNTAIN OF HOMEWORK. BUT God says we can MOVE MOUNTAINS with the faith of a mustard seed. So here I go, gunna move that mountain:)

Keep your chin up, You'll get through whatever you're going through. Hang in there, more importantly Hang on to God. He won't let you go, so don't let go of Him.

The "LIST"

I'm reading this book called "the list" by marian jordan...(ladies, GREAT book I recommend it to YOU!)

It's talking all about girl's hopeless life "lists" and when we all stop and admit it, we all have life lists.
Things we wish to accomplish in our lives by certain milestones or birthdays or markers.
Or we make lists in our future spouses.. whether its a physically written down in black and white or on our hearts minds we have done it at one point in our lives. I mean is it wrong to aspire for high standards and qualities. We are called to not settle. I agree. But are you looking for Christlike qualities OR just looking for a perfect mr. superman. I believe we're ALL human and that we are all God's masterpieces, that are STILL being worked on.
Another LIST in my life is a "I WANT" list.

I want this, I want that.

Top of my list right now is a road bike. then a car.
These things all have one thing in common. MATERIAL possession. Selfish ambitions.
Somehow I think if I have that next great thing then I'll be happy. BUT WILL I? Have you ever wanted something for a long time and when you finally did get it, it wasn't as exciting or great as you thought? You thought that just this ONE more thing would make you happy. That one pair of shoes, that one set of clothes, that one BIKE.....always looking ahead to find joy. I often think when I'm in better shape i'll be happy....loose those few more pounds...be faster...be better at that sport....THEN i'll be HAPPY. But God does not want us to always live for tomorrow. A lesson I have yet to learn!! We can have JOY now! Joy is not found in this world or in any material possessions! That the lie that satan wants us all to believe. If we could cross ONE MORE thing off our list our lives would be better. IT'S ALL LIES!
great quotes..

JOY is not found in some future state; it is available now for those of us willing to make the exchange! The secret of life is not found in consuming but in being consumed by a passion for God- marian jordan

My Mamie

Beauty is in her experienced eyes, which have seen years of joy, pain, war and life.
Beauty is in her golden hair with its sun kissed look of year’s outdoors
Beauty is in her age spots representing a life of hard work and toil.
Beauty is in her hands, which have comforted and cared for others before herself.
Beauty is in her smile, which has light up so many lives with its radiance
Her beauty has only increased with time.
All she may see is imperfections, wrinkles and lines but all I see is a woman who has seen more of life then can be measured and made more of a difference in this world then she could ever know. But more important than the impact she has on this world is the impact she has on my life. She has taught me more then she could ever know and I can see her beauty everyday.

Fantastic Four

It's been a long time since I last wrote in here.
Months have past. Many things have happened.

Camp has always been an amazing experience and as always it seems to fly by in the blink of an eye.
2 months. Gone
This summer was different.
All my summers at Whitesand have been awesome but this one was unforgettable. I made friendships that I hope will never end.
We were inseparable. We were joined at the hip. If you found me you found her. If you were looking for her you found me. Chiara.
Best Friends.
We are the three best friends that anyone could have! Fantastic Four.
This summer was so full of laughs and inside jokes, they'll last a lifetime. It makes me want to jump on a plane and fly back today but I know that no one would be there. Camp is an amazing place but it's about the people! The people are what I miss. What leaves me with a tear stained pillow thinking i'll never see these people again. So I look to that blessed day. That one day when there will be no more goodbyes. When best friends will never have to be distance and grow apart with their own lives. A place where I can be with the Fantastic four forever and my very best friend in the world; Jesus Christ.
DO NOT get me wrong, I am ecstatic to be home with my family. The airport was such a joyful reunion and I did miss my family a lot. I love them to pieces and I love this place. They are some pretty awesome people.
There is however a place in my heart for Whitesand. Leaving it is never easy. The tears flow and the hearts break. Especially when there is no hope of a reunion next summer. It hurts all the more. The days go by in a blurr, just wishing I could see them again, make jokes with them again, laugh till I cry again, just be at that perfect place again.
As I was at the beach yesterday with my little cousins I had some time to think. Here my little cousin is laughing her head off trying to jump and avoid all these waves. She's smiling and laughing, enjoying her time. I thought "I need to do the same." There were three people this summer that had a huge impact on my life. Chiara, Angela, and Jared. These three people are the COOLEST people you will ever meet. As I watched my cousin it reminded me of them and one of the big things they taught me this summer and that was to Just enjoy life in the moment. Don't look forward at what's to come but enjoy where you are right now! Enjoy God in your life right now. Laugh at the jokes. Don't think about leaving or parting but enjoy the time you have with each other RIGHT NOW. So I ran over to my little cousin, took her by the hand and joined her in her wave jumping. Laughing and smiling and making memories. Enjoy today. Enjoy your family and friends today. So while I miss those people with all my heart I will enjoy home. I will be leaving again soon and I really miss my family during the year away. So I'm enjoying my family now:) They are my life.

God calls us to a life of enjoyment. I'm sure he puts people in our lives to enjoy and create everlasting bonds with. May my friendships from this summer not fade out as they have in the past but remain strong and constant. Fantastic Four.



If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Phillipians 2:1-4

Kindness and a Kleenex

"ACHOO!"

I shielded my face from the sneeze of the man in front of me on the escalator. "Bless you" said a woman behind me. He then continued to chat on his cell phone.
This happened three or four times in the span of time I spent behind him on the stairs.

It happens every day. A sneeze and a polite response. "Bless you"
But what the lady did in the next few minutes let me know there is still kindness in this world today.
Reaching the top of the escalator the man quickly began to go on his way still chatting on his cell phone. He seemed to be in a bit of a hurry and frazzled. The lady behind me called out to him, "Sir" and he seemed not to hear her. She walked quickly to him and again said "sir". He turned around and she handed him a Kleenex tissue. "Here, I thought you might need one", She said with a smile and then was just as quickly on her way. He said "thank you" and hurried on his way.

l smiled to myself. How even little acts of kindness do not go unnoticed. I noticed the woman's kind gesture that day in the airport. She'll never know that it touched my heart or that I was blessed by her ever so small act of kindness.

What act of kindness will you do today? Do you think it goes unnoticed, think again. Someone behind you on the escalator might notice and be touched. Go, be blessed:)

Airports

I love Airports.
At least the arrivals...

go to the departure gate and you're flooded with images of tears, sadness, leaving, parting, breaking up, good-byes, and plain unhappiness.
But go to arrivals and there is an sense of happiness and joy amidst the screams of excitement, hellos, reunions, hugs, and smiles. People are meant to be together.

I've had to do a few "departures" just in the last few weeks. I left my best friend on the side walk as I waved good-bye from the van taking me to the airport from Southern Adventist University concluding my sophomore year of college. A ting of sadness and loss gripped my throat and I just watched till I could watch no more. Then the next day I said good-bye to my cousins as I walked through airport security onto my plane headed for Dallas Texas to be reunited with my Aunt and Uncle for a week of fun. Then here we go again... Hugs and farewells to my Aunt as my brother and I walked through airport security onto another waiting area for out flight back home. I reluctantly said goodbye again to a someone I love.

I always seem to be saying goodbye now. Goodbye to my high school classmates as we must move on to grow up on our own and make our own lives. Our class once tight and bonded separated by time and space. We once causally chatting and hanging out now cling to the last few moments of the time we had together during our graduation. Tears stung my eyes on that last day as I watched my friends for so long cry and hug with no more time left.
I say goodbye to my parents every time they come to visit or I go home for a few days. The times at home seems so short. It never really occurred to me that I would not be living at home for much longer. I took my time here for granted. Now I know whenever I get home I will always be packing up again and leaving AGAIN. NOT a fun feeling.
Nothing seems to be sure anymore.

I hate goodbyes.

There's a reunion that I can't wait to be a part of.
One WITHOUT a goodbye.
A reunion that will last forever.
No more tears, no more airport departures, no more graduations, no more farewell hugs, no more empty feelings.
Just a hello to forever with our Lord and Savior.
I can't wait for that day, what about you?
Are you excited for no more parting. I sure am!

REVELATION 21:4 "He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away."

"Car Horns"

I was just recently visiting my Aunt in Grand Prairie TX. I saw more of Texas then probably any Texas citizen as we toured around and had a blast just being tourists. We were waiting at a light and all in the car were deeply enthralled in a conversation and didn't notice immediately the light turning green. As soon as my aunt realized the light had turned and began to step on the gas the truck behind us blared a rude and impatient "BEEEEEP!!!!" I was a big taken back...

Not only did it sounds rude but it was held out obnoxiously long as if to make the drivers frustrated point.
However we brushed it off and drove on.

Next turn a car darts in front of us almost taking off our front bumper and honks loudly as he seems to claim we are the ones doing the "cutting off"

My blood begins to boil. I think to myself how can such a noise create such anger?
The Blair of a horn, the raising of a voice, a harsh gesture all create such intense emotions in a person.

What was the car horn originally made for?
www.cogapa.com says the original creation of the car horn was for safety, as a warning to help save those in danger of our own vehicle. But what has it become? More of a tool for anger and frustration on the road.
Road rage is taken out on others with the blare of a car horn.
We demonstrate our impatient moods and anger as we honk at a car cutting us off or one who seems to be too slow.
Satan seems to take everything and turn it from a good thing (saving lives, a warning) to a tool for anger (frustration, road rage)

So next time you're cut off by a car or feeling impatient at a stop light. Take a breath:) Or give a smile to the driver. Who knows what kind of impact that will have on them rather than a split second decision to blare your horn.

how are we Christians? By showing Christ in ALL we do:) So go. Make someones day a little less frustrating:)

Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus, who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant, and coming in the likeness of men. And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross. Therefore God also has highly exalted Him and given Him the name which is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.
Php 2:5-11 (NKJV)

"Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me"

How many times have you heard that saying?
Too many I would say.
But I don't agree.
Words are powerful!!

I have talked a lot about how words can really hurt someone but until you experience it yourself you'll never know how deep words can cut a person to the heart. I experienced the way words can negatively effect someone even if you only speak them casually or in passing by this past week. There were some words I've been the recipient of that have left me deeply hurt and I don't think I will ever forget them. The person speaking was one in power above me whom I greatly respect. They probably have no idea what they said or even if I heard it, but I did.

Words do hurt. That is a fact.
no riddle or cute saying will change that.

However, how many times have I done the very same thing? Said something against someone whether behind their back or to their faces that was hurtful. They probably still remember it to this day.

So I cannot hold on to those words. I can't let them leave me scared.
I've been reading the book of Proverbs for my devotionals and as I was thinking about what this individual had said I read these passages from Proverbs chapter 11:

"From the fruit of his lips a man is filled with good things as surely as the works of his hands rewards him. The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice. A fool shows his annoyance at once, but a prudent man overlooks insults. Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up." vs. 14-16, 18, 25

Becareful what you say. Hold your tongue. Who knows who is listening?
Words can hurt or heal, What will yours do today??

A Day Without Shoes - Humble me

Proverbs 11:2
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.

I woke up this morning feeling pretty good about myself. Here I was about to walk out into the cold, rainy, thundering day with no shoes on.

Here at southern today was "A Day Without Shoes." A act on the part of students all over campus to put aside their comfy shoes, boots, sandals and just have the experience that so many people around the world experience daily not having shoes to wear. Donations and support was given by many people and I was feeling pretty good that I could help support the cause. Here I was SACRIFICING my comfort of dry feet to head out into the rain without my shoes. I am making a difference right.....right?!

Then God decided to open my eyes and take that pride down a notch. I walked to convocation not thinking anything of the speaker or what I would be hearing today. I took some pictures of my friends and I with bare feet. We were all smiles like this was fun and new for us to be able to go without shoes for a whole day at school.
I found a seat with some of my girlfriends and got comfortable just to get another convo credit to my name.
But God was not finished with me yet....

The speaker got up and with a broken cambodian accent he began to speak. (Peter Pong) He seems extremely nervous and I was not sure how he would get through this talk he had prepared. He struggles to portray his introduction in incorrect english grammar. We all thought it was cute at first and giggled as he talked about himself. Then he got into his story,

As a child he survived the cambodian genocide. The murder, the blood the killing fields. I felt myself getting sick as I heard how the rebel army (Red scarves) killed and brutalized CHILDREN! Forcing them to carry weapons and take the front lines in battle against the Vietnamese. He was forced to watch it all. Not only to watch but to play the flute as they killed his friends. He was lucky enough to have a musical talent so they kept him alive so he could play for the rebel soldiers. However he was NOT exempt from the work (forcing 6-12yr olds to work from 5am - 12pm that night with almost no food) With tears running down his face he finished his life story. But It was more than the expereince he had. It was the things he said that caused me to hang my head in shame.

"I am not powerful because I have money in my pockets or many earthly things, but I am powerful because I am helping people. This is what makes me whole. To help people with all my heart makes me rich."
"We can have peace. Peace starts with me."
"You as Americans are seen as angels from the kids in Cambodia. Yet you are in worship of your malls. You move away from one mall and then next thing you find all the teens wandering a new mall. Reach outside your store walls, reach to others."
He grew up without parents, His life is filled with confusion, pain and suffering.
A big thing that hit me was when he said..."You have parents, for just that fact you should love them. I grew up without them. So many americans treat their parents like s*** (he didn't know that that was a bad word. Again he was brutally INNOCENTLY honest) BUT just in the fact you HAVE parents you are blessed!!"
WE are so blessed, us american angels to them.

There I sat. So inspired yet so humbled. Here is a man who gave all he had. I could tell his heart was laid out for us all out to see this morning. He may have not been the most eloquent speaker, with proper english or comfy terms. He was brutally innocently honest.

I thought that by my act of just not wearing shoes I was somehow changing the world. There is so much we can do for others. I'm not bashing the fact that today was not of use. It was an awesome opportunity to help and support an AMAZING cause. I just need to realize I am so blessed and there's always more I can do. Let's just say it was an inspiration. I hope it has inspired you too. You are SO blessed!! God daily opens my eyes.

He finished by playing his flute. I closed my eyes and listened. Imagining a little boy standing in the midst of dead bodies allowed to live through his music. I then looked into his soft face. Tears still staining his cheeks. How can I help him I thought? How can I, a lowly human, help the thousands of people suffering? Standing the student audience gave him an honorable standing ovation. I've stood for standing ovations before but it has never really been from my heart. I sprang to my feet instantly. He had changed me. God had changed me. Looking down at my barefeet I didn't see them as a huge sacrifice to me but a small contribution in a bigger picture. Help us Lord. We need you here. How can we help? We can. Christ can.

(He has an organization called cambodian live arts to help those masters from the genocide who were still living. He is passing down the culture lost in the genocide to the younger generation. ) He's just a man. I'm just a Southern student but he's reached out to those around him. Hes striving to help. Now how can I?

Proverbs 11:2
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.

Growing up in God

I set aside my diapers - I thought I was grown up
I got my very own bank account - I thought I was grown up
I began high school - I thought I was grown up
I received my driver's license - I thought I was grown up
I passed my golden birthday - I was sure now I was grown up
I graduated from high school - I thought I was grown up
I began my freshman year at University - I thought I was grown up
I finished my freshman year in University - I thought I was grown up
I turned 20 - I thought I was grown up
I'm finishing my SOPHOMORE year in University - Now I know, I'm still not grown up

Ever since I was little I've always been reaching towards the next "event or milestone" in my life. High school, getting my license, graduations, sports events, birthdays, university) the list goes on. I always thought that once I reached that next big thing, that was it. I would have my life together. I would be "GROWN UP". A mature adult. But every time I pass one of those milestones I see one more ahead. I see I still have so much to learn. So much to experience. I never feel fully prepared for what lies ahead. But that's where I make my mistake. I will never feel prepared on my own to face life's challenges. In the big things and the little things my life required God. In every aspect of me, there within HE should be. I will never feel like a GROWN UP, cause I'll always be growing. Same with my spiritual life. God always has something to teach me. I will ever continually be GROWING UP IN christ, spiritually. So I pray Lord will always be teaching me. Guiding me. cause I still feel like a child sometimes.

Treadmill

I cannot not run more than 7miles on a treadmill. That's even pushing it really hard!
A treadmill to me as a human seems like a hamster ball is to a hamster.
They can run with all their heart but never really go anywhere.
I mean the treadmill is so boring!! No scenery, no fresh air, no pounding pavement under your feet, nothing....
Does your life ever feel like a "treadmill"?
You're running as fast as you can go but there you are, stuck in the spot, on that treadmill as it speeds up under your exhausted feet pounding the track.

A friend asked me the other day, "so what's new?"
My response was so plain i kinda surprised myself "nothing"

NOTHING! How do days seem to go by in a blurr.
Classes go by day by day and seem so ROUTINE.
You can't even remember what you did the day before.

My schedule is taped to my wall from the beginning of this semester. I don't look at it anymore. Its so engrained in my mind I don't even take as much as a glance at it every now and again anymore. My days are routines. Schedules. Deadlines.

This is not how Christ wants us to live. Each day is a GIFT.
Such a blessing. A new day! A new page! A new opportunity!

Do you know how much you can do WITH TODAY!!
the possibilities are limitless.
Carpe Diem, and take this day for GOD.
Ask Him what he wants YOU to do TODAY!
I can only do the same!
Wake up excited:) You HAVE ANOTHER DAY.
Don't make today another "treadmill" day.

Someone needs you today.
God can use you today.
Be Totally committed today:)

"Do you not know that in a race all the runners run but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize." 1 Corinthians 9:24

"In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord directs his steps." Proverbs 16:9

BEST FRIENDS

See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. 1 John 3:1

Have you ever been afraid to refer to someone as your "BEST friend", especially face to face to them?
What if you're not THEY don't consider you their best friend?
What if they only consider you a "GOOD" friend?
It would be a one way street, you would be embarrassed.

I use to think that way.

I didn't want to write to someone, in a card,

to my best friend,

in case they didn't feel that way about me or their "BEST" friend was someone else.

But it's just the plain truth. To me you are my best friend.
Whether you feel that way or not its true.

Christ is not afraid to call us his BEST FRIENDS.
EVEN if its not recipricated back to him. We may not feel he's our best friend but he calls us that anyways.
He's not ashamed, so neither should we be! Call him by his rightful name,
BEST FRIEND, FATHER, SAVIOR, KING, CREATOR, SAVIOR, PRINCE OF PEACE!!!!!
How amazing is that!
You are the creator of the universe, savior of all, His BEST FRIEND.
Not only does he call you his bestie, your his child, his very own!!

So even though you may not consider him so, he's not afraid to tell the universe that you mean the world to Him.
He's the best friend you could ever ask for,
and with arms stretched open wide, and nailed to a cross he proved this to you.
So go ahead. Tell someone their your best friend. Don't be shy.

John 15:15 As a disciple, I am a friend of Jesus Christ.
I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.

Ever wonder why somethings come so easy to other people.
There's the athletically gifted classmate who you can't stand to watch as they effortlessly blow past you in the 100m dash.
The girl who never seems to study but somehow seems to get straight A's.
The guy who has no stage fright and just sings melodious songs of blessings every time he steps on stage.
Your friend who can perform a skill you'll never be able to dream of trying. (my specific struggle this week:(
Somethings really come easy to other people who seem more skilled then we are...

There is a skit on youtube done by onetimeblind called "More Coke"
This skit can take the words right out of my mouth sometimes as I seem to be jealous those around me.
Jesus gives a girl a small bottle of coke (for my purposes I say sprite!) but he gives another guy a bigger bottle and so on until the girl gets so mad that everyone else is getting better "gifts" then her.

There's also a story I use to read all the time when I was little in a book of the Bierenstien bears called "Green-eyed monster", all about a sister who is miserable in the jealousy she has of her brother's better birthday gifts.

Sometimes I get so caught up in other people gifts I completely ignore God's plan for me. Have you ever really thought about all the potential you have in Christ? It may not be upfront, center stage but someone's gotta work backstage too:) My mom always reminds me to stop looking at other but to look to Jesus. He's the only one who can help us use what we have, great or small. I have a not stuck to the top of my mirror that reminds me to do just that. "Turn your eyes upon Jesus" I just have to keep reminding myself that!

Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning the shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:2

So what are you going to do with your "gift of sprite" today?? whether its a small 20oz or a whole liter it's for you to use to the best of your ability.

Love like a child

For this spring break I've been working in the wellness center and specifically in Child Care. Parents can bring their kids and I will babysit while they go and workout on the fitness floor. Normally I'm a floor worker however this was a nice break and change of pace from standing around in the weight room so I was enjoying my time to relax in there. I haven't had many kids stop in so I was not prepared for a brother and sister to come bouncing in to the room with their parents close at foot. They were real lively kids and kept me on my toes for the hour that their parents were gone. The boy wanted to watch 3,2,1, Penguins however he didn't want to watch the whole thing. He kept rewinding the last 2 minutes of it and watched it over and over and over and over probably about 15 times. The little girls always wanted me to do what she was doing. If she was coloring she wanted to me color. If she was playing with blocks she wanted me playing with blocks. If she wanted to play firetruck well I was the house on fire for her. To say the lest they were fun kids. As they got ready to go we cleaned up the room and put the toys away. They showed their parents their drawings and were excited to go swimming next as their parents had promised them. On the way out the little girl latched on my leg squeezing for all she was worth. I bent down to her level and gave her a hug. She pulled back and puckered up her lips so I gave her my cheeck and she planted a wet one right on my face. It was so cute. "buh bies" she whispered and quickly she ran off after her brother and mom heading out to the swimming pool. I just kind of stayed squatted and took it all in. What complete trust that little girl had. To her I was a complete stranger just 45min ago and now she takes me in her little arms in a big hug and to her I'm a friend. How many of us can say thats how we treat those around us. With complete trust and LOVE. Love like Jesus loved. It made me stop and think of how I treat strangers I meet. Do I stereotype the minute I see them and judge them based on appearance. Unfortunately I can't say I don't. We created an opinion on someone before becoming their friend or getting to know them. To this girl I was her best friend the moment I began to color with her. She has no bias against me, no preconceived ideas but just was happy to have a friend and to ultimately love my like Jesus. No faults. If I could love the way a child loves. Does not keep track of wrongs but simply loves. I learned my lesson today. Lord Help me love like a child, to Love like YOU DID.

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will abide in the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust.” Psalm 91

Little Faith

That was scary!

in a situation where there is absolutely nothing you can do but pray.
FAITH seems to kick in big time all of a sudden.

"my best friend is a student missonary in the Marshal Islands, Majuro and yesterday while I was at my boss's house for lunch he recieved a text message from this girl's parents. It said to pray for Nicole and the other SM's because the massive 8.8 Earthquake that hit Chile that morning had caused a Tsunami warning for her area. And the Island she is on is tiny, like a little sand bar in the ocean."

I immediately began to pray. All day I prayed in my head.
It was suppose to hit the island around 8pm. I was watching a movie with my friend but I couldn't enjoy it. I couldn't concentrate.
All I could think about how little I could do to help.
I knew there were people all over the globe (friends, family) praying and I know there is power in prayer but i was still worried.


WHY?!?!
why was I worried.
Oh ye of LITTLE FAITH!!
Its like I could have done something myself!
But I got a text from a friend that said "Don't worry, The man upstairs has got it all under control"
He is so right.
What did I have to worry??
WHATEVER happens God's got the whole world in His hands. Just like the song I use to sing when I was little.

"He's got the whole world in his hands, He's got the whole world in His hands, He's got the whole wide world in His hands. He's got you and me sister, brother IN HIS HANDS!"
so as a reminder to me, my little faith still needs to grow.
to a mustard seed faith, a faith that can move mountains
and to give me a calm in trouble.

Matthew 17:20
He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you

p.s. she's fine lol. I got a funny voice mail from her this morning:) all the SM's on the Marshal Islands are okay:)

Fear

I've always seemed to have a fear of something...

when I was little it was the dark
as I grew it turned into growing up, leaving, college, ect...


I've feared what other people think of me
I'm afraid of a roundoff back handspring on the floor
I've had a fear of something under my bed
I'm afraid of failure
I'm afraid of big spiders
I've had a fear of being kidnapped lol
I'm afraid of letting people down
I've had a fear of heights

everyone has fears but...

I look around and I see so many people who don't seem afraid
They don't care what others think so they are just themselves
God did not create fear but He is the only one who can help us with our fears,
Doesn't mean we'll never be afraid but it does mean He'll ALWAYS be by our sides when things get scary (like my maman who never left my bedside when I was afraid:)

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth should change and though the mountains slip into the heart of the sea; though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains quake at its swelling pride. Selah. The LORD of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our stronghold. Selah. Psalm 46:1-3,7

How Deep the Fathers Love for Us!

This song really spoke to me this morning (at 4am!)

How deep the Father's love for us,
How vast beyond all measure
That He should give His only Son
To make a wretch His treasure

How great the pain of searing loss,
The Father turns His face away
As wounds which mar the chosen One,
Bring many sons to glory

Behold the Man upon a cross,
My sin upon His shoulders
Ashamed I hear my mocing voice,
Call out among the scoffers

It was my sin that helf Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I knoww that it is finished

I will not boast in anything
No gifts, no power, no wisdom
But I will boast inJesus Christ
His death and resurrection

Why should I gain from His reward?
I cannot give an answer
But this I know with all my heart
His wounds have paid my ransom

Listen to this song :http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UjD0lv8hx5o

God Listens

I was flipping through my bible this morning and stopped at a green highlighted box. I read from the women's devotional bible and there are sections of important verses that are put into boxes and highlighted. For some reason this one caught my attention.
The verse is Deuteronomy 4:7

"What other nation is so great as to have their god near them the way the Lord our God is near us whenever we pray to Him?'

How true and sweet is this? What other nation or religion has God as such a personal, loving saviour?
Many other worldly religions hold their God at arms length away afraid he will punish them with fire or brimstone if they make one mistake or wrong move. But our God, the God of everyone was willing to sacrifice everything for just one of us to be saved. He takes the time to listen to our everyday problems and come near to us when we pray. What an amazing God we have! Have you talked to Him lately.

This is a reminder to me as well. He's there, waiting, ready to listen, have we talked to him lately??
Try applying the Lord's prayer to yourself. It works.

Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed by they name. (Praise Him)
They kingdom come, they will be done as on earth as it is in heaven. (What do you need help with deciding today?)
Give us this day our daily bread (Thank Him for provisions)
and forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors, (need help with a sin?)
and lead us not into temptation but deliver us from the evil one, (He's got your back, what do you need help overcoming? Who do you need to forgive?)
for thine is the kingdom and the glory and the power forever and ever amen. (Praise Him again)

Go ahead. He can't wait to hear from ya. He's all ears:)

Your Name

I love to hear people call me by name.

When a person knows your name, in essence they know you. A name tells a lot about a person. It can depict a strong national heritage or reflect on past loved ones. Its a very sweet sound to hear your own name.
Being here at Southern I have learned the effect that knowing somones name can have on them. It can be pretty embarrasing to be joyfully greeted in the hall way or on the prominade by someone but you just can't seem to remember their name. You may make up some generic term for them such as "hi friend" or simply move on to "how are you doing?" trying to avoid the fact that you have no idea or recollection of what their name is. It's just as hard to be on the recieving end of this dead end "oh shoot! I can't remember their name" look from someone else. We want people to know us, for them to remember us. Carrie Unerwood sings a song entitled "Don't forget to Remember Me." Everyone wants to be remembered by their name.
Ever since I can remember my maman has gotten my uncles and my brothers name mixed up constantly. She's not the only one. Numerous people in my family will call my uncle - Eric or my brother - Remy and we've all just gotten use to it. We'll correct them and give a little chuckle. Friends will do it to. Call you by someone elses name or just plain have a mind blank and forget yours altogether. It happens to everyone at some point.

But Jesus will NEVER forget your name. He has it written on the palms of His hands. In the scars.
It's written in his books.
John tells us in John 10:3 "The watchman opens the gate for him, and the sheep listen to his voice. He calls his own sheep BY NAME and leads them out." How sweet is it to hear Jesus call your name.


So next time you hear someone call you by name think of Christ, He's calling you by name, go to Him. But now thus says the Isaiah 43:1 Lord, he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: “Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine.

BUT God

Have you ever read a text and it's listing all these tragedies, hard times, sorrows, pains and death? Did you continue reading and see the next sentence..."but God"
I heard a sermon on this one text; Ephesians 2:4 It depicts in the previous verse how sinful and hateful our actions are and there we see it! Verse 4 BUT GOD who is rich in mercy, for his great love wherewith he loved us, even when we were dead in sins, hath quickened us together with christ and by grace ye are saved.
Isn't that amazing?


You're a sinner - BUT GOD saved you [John 3:16]
You're confused - BUT GOD's grace is sufficient for you [2Cor. 12:9]
You feel lost -BUT GOD found you [Hebrews 13:5]
You're worried BUT GOD has not given you a spirit of fear [2Timothy 1:7]
You can't do it BUT GOD is able [2 Cor. 9:8]
You're too tired BUT GOD will give you rest [Matthew 11:28-30]
You can't forgive yourself BUT GOD has already forgiven you [1 John 1:9]
You're hurting BUT GOD hurts with you!

So next time you go through pain or you're feeling lost and alone remember "BUT GOD"
BUT GOD has already gone through it all. He's taken our sin and thrown them into the deepest part of the deepest ocean never to be brought up again. Pain on this earth is REAL BUT GOD IS COMING SOON! He will come to take us home, away from this pain and suffering we see all around us. So keep the faith.

Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and i will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matt. 11:28-30

"Blessed and Breathing?"

Genesis 2:7 The LORD God formed the man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being.

Can you hear your heartbeat? Can you feel your pulse? Take a deep breath.

That's life.

Life is a blessing in itself. Sometimes we get so caught up with things we want, people let us down, a big test in class, our mistakes we forget to just stop and realize we're breathing.

If you are breathing you are blessed.

Everyday we wake up to take a deep breath and start the day we are enjoying God's riches blessing: LIFE. We are still alive and breathing. Why not take advantage of that and do something good today. Take that breath of life you were given and put it to God's use. (which in fact is good use!)

Schedules seems to overwhelm, people seems to load on the pressure and decisions seems to cloud our view as to how blessed we really are. We go around with long faces and tired expressions so caught up in our reality we miss someone else's reality. I do it all the time. I get so caught up in my "list of things to do" I forget to look up and see someone hurting or in need of me.

Christ gave up his breath so we could breath.

Life is a blessing.

Treat it that way.

And next time someone asks you "How are you doing?" You can say with your head held high, "I am blessed and breathing:)"